What I see in different shades of gray, from behind my reading glasses
The hardest thing I’ve had to do all day was to unpin a chat with a human that was steadfastly optimistic, and left the organisation today. I will still be in touch, but the context in which we grew together no longer is common. That feels tougher than it should.
Inspiring people are everywhere. Not merely inspiring, they are generous with their ideas, their advice, and their time. I’m truly lucky to have come across many such people throughout my career. In the early phase of my career, I’ve been guilty of not acknowledging their help, sometimes even brashly disregarding and/or disrespecting them.
It’s only upon reflection that I see how much their support has meant, how much they’ve influenced the way I think and behave. I’ve been able to reconnnect with several of them over the years. It’s lucky that many are still alive, and are accessible. I’ve made the the time to acknowledge their help to me. I’ve regretted deeply that it took me such a long time to understand and acknowledge. Better late than never.
I reconnected with another person today, after being reminded of their support by an article posted about them. They’ve probably forgotten me already, given the number of people they meet on a daily basis. They’ve very likely forgotten the questions they asked at the time, over a decade ago. I have too, but I remember how they made me feel.
It’s been a good day to reconnect. It’s been a good day to pay it forward too.
“An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn, she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants, and raised her legs. The dentist said, “Excuse me, but I’m not a gynecologist.” “I know,” said the old lady. “I want you to take my husband’s teeth out”
I’d like to get on this bandwagon on self-deprecating humor, but I’m not sure if I’ll be good at it. 🙂
Impostor syndrome raises its ugly head and screams out loudly every time I join in one of these fascinating sessions I’m on a distribution list of. The speaker today was the author John Markoff, who’s biography of Stewart Brand is just out.
Listening to the speakers in the audience, many of who have had more experience than I’ve been alive, whose accomplishments dwarf everyone else’s by miles, is the simplest way I’ve known of learning about ideas and people. And tonight was no different.
I also realised that I’ve already been reading many of the links and references that were shared today. What I’ve not done (or even know how to approach) is to synthesize these ideas so I can express them. Something to learn.
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills. There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.
I started dividing my to-do list into 1) things I have to do, 2) things I want to do, and 3) things other people want me to do. Life changing! I often don’t get to #3 and I finally realized… this is what it means to have boundaries.
What one rule would you get rid of that would automatically improve the quality of your day?
Referring to Lisa Bodell’s book “Kill the Company”, I read a couple of articles today that wondered what “stupid rules” could be killed that would immediately remove a massive frustration for people in the team.
Reflecting on my own life, I think the rule that kids should be quiet when they’re learning something has my vote. I will struggle with it, particularly with 11-year-old, but it’s incredibly hard to concentrate for any longer than 20 minutes for adults. Why do our learning institutions (and myself included) insist that kids do it for longer than that?
I observed today also something that made me want to contribute what little I can that could potentially help youth and young kids. It will take a lot of self-reflection to reconsider my decision from a couple of decades ago. I left feeling disheartened and worn-down by the bureaucracy and politics and hypocrisy. Has it changed that much? Have I changed since then?
What might happen if instead of doing things As Soon As Possible, we did them As Slow As Possible?
The Long Now Foundation’s recent article that got me thinking about this concept for my own life. What things are worth taking the time to do deliberately, slowly?
The pace of the last week – the conversations, the commute, the long chats with a couple of friends, the sleep patterns, domestic needs – each seemed to be prefaced or ended at a faster pace than I was ready for. Reading all afternoon, sitting at the dinner table, has been a dramatically different pace to everything else I’ve done today, including typing out this thought.
I missed a day of writing a daily blog post. No regrets.
It’s been three long days of commuting, and the wild weather that started yesterday added its special sauce too. It was all worth the effort, because I got to spend time with people I respect, admire, learn from, and love dearly. The project I was working on – a handwritten compilation of heartfelt notes of appreciation to the soon departing bossman – reached it’s intended recipient. No words were spoken, neither possible nor necessary. He has been the finest examples of leadership I’ve ever had the privilege of witnessing. Watching him walk out the door this evening was an overwhelming, sorrowful feeling.
Witnessing authentic leadership at close quarters is also incredibly inspiring. Titles don’t matter. Words, behaviours, relationships, conversations do. Helping people accomplish what they want, or more often, don’t even realise they are capable of, is a magnificently satisfying, immensely appealing idea that I’ve come to value highly.
